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I've also been reading the Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis. Lewis captures the little nuances of our faith so well and the character of God behind every moment. It's so masterful =)
Excerpts that gripped my heart:
"But please, please -- won't you -- can't you give me something that will cure mother?" Up till then he had been looking at the Lion's great feet and the huge claws on them; now, in his despair, he looked up at its face. What he saw surprised him as much as anything in his whole life. For the tawny face was bent down near his own and (wonder of wonders) great shining tears stood in the Lion's eyes. They were such big, bright tears compared with Digory's own that for a moment he felt as if the Lion must really sorrier about his Mother than he was himself."
About your own desires:
"Come in by the gold gates or not at all,
Take of my fruit for others to forbear,
For those who steal or those who climb my wall
Shall find their heart's desire and find despair."
This final conversation between the witch and the boy put chills in my bones and gripped my heart.
"
'I know what errand you have come on,' continued the Witch. 'For it was I who was close beside you in the woods last night and heard all your counsels. You have plucked fruit from the garden yonder. You have it in your pocket now. And you are going to carry it back, untasted to the Lion; for HIM to eat, for HIM to use. You simpleton! Do you know what that fruit is? I will tell you. It is the apple of youth., the apple of life. I know, for I have tasted it; and I feel already such changes in myself tat I know I shall never grow old or die. Eat it, Boy, eat it; and you and I will both live for ever and be king and queen of this whole world -- or of your world, if we decide to go back there.'
'No thanks,' said Digory, ' I don't know that I care much about living on and on after everyone I know is dead. I'd rather live an ordinary time and die and go to Heaven.'
'But what about this Mother of yours whom you pretend to love so?'
'What's she got to do with it?' said Digory.
'Do you no see, Fool, that one bite of that apple would heal her? You have it in your pocket. We are here by ourselves and the Lion is far away. Use your Magic and go back to your own world. A minute later you can be at your Mother's bedside, giving her the fruit. Five minutes later you will see the colour coming back to her face. She will tell you the pain is gone. Soon she will tell you she feels stronger. Then she will fall asleep -- think of that; hours of sweet natural sleep, without pain, without drugs. Next day everyone will be saying how wonderfully she has recovered. Soon she will be quite well again. All will be well again. Your home will be happy again. You will be like other boys.'
'Oh!' gasped Digory as if he had been hurt, and put his hand to his head. For he now knew that the most terrible choice lay before him.
'What has the Lion ever done for you that you should be his slave?' said the Witch. 'What can he do to you once you are back in your own world? And what would your Mother think if she knew you could have taken her pain away and given her back her life, and saved your Father's heart from being broken, and that you wouldn't -- that you'd rather run messages for a wild animal in a strange world that is no business of yours?'
'I--I don't think he is a wild animal,; said Digory in a dried up sort of voice. 'He is -- I don't know --"
'Then he is something worse,' said the Witch. 'Look what he has done to you already; look how heartless he has made you. That is what he does to everyone who listens to him. Cruel, pitiless boy! You would let your own Mother die rather than --'
'Oh, shut up,' said the miserable Digory, still in the same voice. 'Do you think I don't see? But I-- I promised.'
'Ah, but you didn't know what you were promising. And no one here can prevent you.'
'Mother herself, ' said Digory, getting the words out with difficulty, 'wouldn't like it -- awfully strict about keeping promises -- and all that sort of thing. She'd tell me not to do it -- quick as anything if she were here.'
'But she need never know,' said the Witch, speaking more sweetly than you would have thought anyone with so fierce a face could speak. 'You wouldn't tell her how you'd got the apple. Your Father need never know. No one in your world need know anything about this whole story. You needn't take the little girl back with you, you know.'
That was where the Witch made her fatal mistake. Of course Digory knew that Polly could get away by her own ring as easily as he could get away by his. But apparently the Witch didn't know this. And the meanness of the suggestion that he should leave Polly behind suddenly made all the other things the Witch had been saying sound false and hollow. And even in the midst of all this misery, his head suddenly cleared, and he said (in a different and much louder voice):
'Look here; where do YOU come into all this? Why are YOU so precious fond of MY mother all of a sudden? What's it got to do with you? What's your game?'
'Good for you Digs,' whispered Polly in his ear. 'Quick! Get away NOW.' "
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| I've been reading.
"Come Thirsty" by Max Lucado... and he paints an interesting thing about the Prodigal Son....
So the son comes home, garbed in the robes and signet ring and the elder brother still seething with all types of malice takes advantage of his brother's lack of intimacy with the Father.
"Your robes are being worn the wrong way"
"Didn't you know that you wore the ring on the wrong finger? Dad doesn't like it when people where the rings on the wrong finger."
"You're doing it all wrong."
So the Father comes to his younger son and wants to embrace him once again, but the younger son is ashamed, he ducks his head not wanting to know how he's disappointed the Father and runs away instead.
I think one of the foremost things God has been saying is "WHO TOLD YOU THE KINGDOM WAS NOT ADVANCING:? WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE DOING A POOR JOB? WHY HAVE YOU NOT COME TO ME INSTEAD?"
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| Prodigal Me.
So I left the house lured by fun. Easy games, easy companions.
Mirth and perversity, so deliciously forbidden ... so much sweeter to taste.
Till I ran out of money...
I begged for food and mercy
Enslaved to the unmerciful.
I hated being a slave.
So I came home running.
Your arms were open wide.
You put your signet ring on me, your best robe.
And the keys to the estate were mine once again.
I took this seriously.
I oversaw your military, trained with your men daily.
I fought against rebels.
I expanded the territory, cared for your people.
But the war raged daily.
There was no rest. I could not leave my post... it was exhausting.
I was a slave again.
I hated being a slave.
You promised me victory, but the war never ended.
The people grew restless and I secretly agreed.
I saw people leave, and I would follow them out... only to sneak back in.
I remembered my old friends on the outside
They were still wealthy and profiting from the war
I hated them but envied their irresponsibility.
Seeing me with wealth, they quickly invited me back to their games.
Them I did not trust, but games and perversity were still deliciously forbidden and I indulged in the irresponsibility.
I avoided You at home.
Hating you for making me a slave, yet bound to the duty.
I owed You too much.
And You asked too much.
I was dying on the inside.
One day our eyes met.
Yours full of compassion
Mine full of hate and bitterness.
And You said "There is only room for one Master. But I wanted you to be my bride."
I recognized the words... ones that had filled me with hope once.
But that was another arrow...
It's been two years, I do not feel like a bride.
All I do and know is slavery.
...........................................................
I wrote this yesterday, but I wasn't ready to share it.
Today the worship leader inadvertantly shared a prophesy that made more and more sense as the day went on.
Just like the Israelites in the desert, there are stragglers that need to die off before movement to the Promise land.
Last month I had a vision of the enemy waiting patiently for me to bite the dust so that he could stake my head on a spit and ward off people from starting ministries.
I refuse to "bite the dust."
................................................................
The ultimate message I got through this whole argument with God was this:
"Today if you hear My voice, do not harden your heart."
"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."
"Not by power nor by might, but by My spirit."
"
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| Believing in Jesus' ability to clear ALL sin makes us righteous.
So let's sin all the time!
When I hear of consequences... I was always under the impression that if we continued sinning it meant that we really didn't respect or believe in Jesus... and that meant we would end up in hell cuz God's justice demanded that all sin led to death.
But I believe the consequences of continued sin after knowing about Christ's work on the cross isn't that forgiveness is renounced.... but the real consequence of continued sin destroys our hearts.....it's the belief that Jesus won't be able to look past the betrayal and forgive again and again and again. I certainly wouldn't....no human would. No human experience really would. there is just too much history from human flaws that convinces us of conditional love. From that perspective sin changes the way you can receive from God. It doesn't mean God stops giving the best, that would be vindictive. But you stop reaching for the best because of guilt. You don't think you deserve it, even when its yours.
So you teach yourself to suck it up and live with scraps as a choice because its fair...JUST to be defaulted into such a state. All the while you are skeptical and envious of people who seem to live with so much more. Skeptical that their joy will last because yours didn't. And envious because their joy is lasting so much longer than yours and you don't know the secret.
so you ask... what is the secret?
And they say... "I stopped living for me. I don't do what I want to do, I do what God wants me to do. I deny my flesh, I get my head right with God's word everyday... and I take it a day at a time."
And something inside dies a bit more. "That's too hard. I can't deny myself what I want. I want to be an individual not a puppet. I guess I forfeited my right to joy."
All the while God never stopped loving you, giving you the best, or pursuing your heart. But sin which is placing yourself or anything else above God..... makes guilt strangle you from your inheritance. And God didn't do it. He allowed it to happen though....
I think the terminal lesson is .... You can't love God.. and make room for pride.
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| My friend had bought me one of these as a present from Hong Kong about two years ago. But as the packaging was written in Japanese I thought I was a heat pack warmed through boiling it in water. Needless to say, I never used it. Yesterday while helping my friend pick a present for her boyfriend, we walked past a stand selling these hot packs. As the jelly sac transformed into a solid lattice of heat releasing joy... I couldn't WAIT to get home and try mine out. Sure enough, it worked! For about 15 minutes, my hands savoured the heat that emanated from this scientific wonder. But I got impatient and I wanted to see the chemical reaction spread again.. it was so cool and beautiful... Wanna see? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxQpThkRGOE&feature=related
Boiling it would return the supersaturated crystalline lattice into a liquid form because the heat in the boiling water breaks the bonds formed... so I boiled some water.. and dropped my pack into it. Sure enough the edges began to transform into a jelly-like substance once again. BUTTT.. I got too impatient. I decided to speed up the process forgetting about densities. I chucked the solid into the hot water I had boiled and put it in the microwave. What I forgot was that that as the solid turned into a liquid the extra space created an air pocket that caused my heat pack to float on the water instead of staying immersed. The plastic melted and consequently ruptured at certain points... leaking the essence of my new found toy out 
TYPICAL. It lasted ONE USE... because I pulled a Jenn. I can't tell you how sad and frustrated I was lol.RAWR
These reusable heat packs are 5 bucks. If you don't mind spending 10-15 minutes boiling it back so you can reuse it .. and if you just love the science behind it... it makes for a good times =)
Mechanism of Action: (snagged from Wiki)
A sodium acetate heat pad is a reusable heat reservoir. It contains a supersaturated solution of sodium acetate (NaCH3COO). Crystallization is triggered by flexing a small flat disc of notched ferrous metal embedded in the liquid. Pressing the disc releases very tiny adhered crystals of sodium acetate into the solution which then act as nucleation sites for the recrystallization of the remainder of the salt solution. Because the liquid is supersaturated, this makes the solution crystallize suddenly, thereby releasing the energy of the crystal lattice. The pad can be reused by placing it in boiling water for 10–15 minutes, which redissolves the sodium acetate in the contained water and recreates a supersaturated solution. Once the pad has returned to room temperature it can be triggered again. Really cool eh? | | |
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